Note to myself: Take the Xanax when this damn narrative starts. Before you're a sobbing wreck. When the thoughts come, it's time.
The Xanax was prescribed to help.
What if I'm taking too much and abusing them?
You are only taking two a day, the Rx was for three+ a day.
But the Rx doesn't have enough pills for three+ a day. It's a test! You are going to fail and she will refuse to help you!
It's not a test. If I run out I'm sure she'll write another Rx for the remaining 15 or so pills.
But what if she won't because you've become a Xanax addict? What if you don't really need them. You're just taking them because it feels good?
Two a day does not an addict make. Are you high right now?
No. But what if I can't function without the two a day?
Then you take the two a day because they are helping you.
What if she decides I'm doing better and don't need the Xanax anymore and I bottom out again?
Doubtful. But if that happens talk to her. I'm sure she'll help you.
I feel myself slowing down. What am I without the constant fear?
Alive.
The Xanax was prescribed to help.
What if I'm taking too much and abusing them?
You are only taking two a day, the Rx was for three+ a day.
But the Rx doesn't have enough pills for three+ a day. It's a test! You are going to fail and she will refuse to help you!
It's not a test. If I run out I'm sure she'll write another Rx for the remaining 15 or so pills.
But what if she won't because you've become a Xanax addict? What if you don't really need them. You're just taking them because it feels good?
Two a day does not an addict make. Are you high right now?
No. But what if I can't function without the two a day?
Then you take the two a day because they are helping you.
What if she decides I'm doing better and don't need the Xanax anymore and I bottom out again?
Doubtful. But if that happens talk to her. I'm sure she'll help you.
I feel myself slowing down. What am I without the constant fear?
Alive.
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